Haffle Wouse

I just (Well not exactly just because I played Rock Band for a while before I got on here.) got back from Waffle House, or as D.J. refers to it, Haffle Wouse. If you've never called it that, you definitely should because it's much more fun than the actual name, but I digress. We entered said restaurant around 6:45 (We would have gone sooner but the Cowboys game went into overtime. Sadly, they lost, but I digress again.) and spent 5 minutes trying to find a place to sit. It's not that the restaurant was crowded. In fact, we were the only people there but the tables that weren't completely covered with dirty dishes were soaking wet from being cleaned right before we got there. We finally settled on a wet table and had just gotten it mostly dried off with a handful of napkins snagged from another table when the waitress appeared out of nowhere and slapped a soaking wet towel down on the table and got it just as wet as it was before.

When the waitress came back to take our order, I told her what I wanted then told her again because she didn't hear. It went like this all around the table. Nothing like a waitress that doesn't pay attention. We got our food, bits at a time, but that's not really a surprise because they always give it to you in bits at Waffle House (or Haffle Wouse) but it seemed to take forever for the waffles to get there. This didn't really matter to me because I didn't get a waffle, but it's still part of the story. When the waffles did finally arrive, they came with no syrup and no butter. A few minutes of everyone just sitting there not eating their waffles went by before the waitress walked back by. By this time one of my friends had run out of Coke. She got the waitress's attention and asked for butter, syrup, and more Coke. The waitress muttered something unintelligible and wandered off. After messing around at the other end of the restaurant doing who knows what, she came back with syrup and butter, no Coke.

My friend, who likes syrup and had smothered her waffle with it, soon became desperate for more Coke, and understandably judging from the amount of syrup on her plate. Unfortunately for her, our waitress had apparently disappeared into a black hole because she was nowhere to be found. Eventually she got the attention of the sole cook, who was busy with a few other people that had come in by that time, and asked if she could get another drink. The kind cook obliged and my very grateful friend downed most of the drink in one gulp.

As we were eating, our wonderful waitress (Who had magically reappeared by this time.) only stopped by our table once to check on us. It normally annoys me when waitresses constantly check up on you while you're eating, but the one time she stopped by, she asked if she could take any of our plates (They always give you way too many plates at Waffle House and the tables are small and get cramped easily.). We said yes and indicated the plates she should take. She looked at us like we were idiots and walked off.

Once we had finally finished our meals, conserving our drinks because of our knowledge of how difficult it is to get a refill, we sat and waited for the waitress to bring the check. She never came. We sat until 8:00 (recall we arrived at 6:45 and were most likely done eating by 7:15) without the waitress so much as looking in our direction. Finally D.J. got up and and found her to ask her for the check. She brought it and looked annoyed that we had bothered her, even though she had left us mostly alone for over an hour. Between the 4 of us, we left $2 for a tip and got up to pay. I was first in line at the register but had to wait several minutes while she flopped her soaking wet towel down on some counter that didn't need cleaning, and took her time doing it, too. When she finally got to me, she once again gave me the annoyed look and halfway through swiping my card stopped to have a discussion about A-1 sauce with a random guy sitting near by. Waffle House doesn't even have A-1 sauce. According to my friends, she was even ruder to them than she was to me. Once of them even told her to have a good night and she stared like that was the most idiotic thing on the planet to say and remained silent.

And that is the story of my awful trip to Waffle House. It took forever to tell because I bought When Harry Met Sally the other day and decided to put it on. It keeps distracting me. I started typing this at the beginning of the movie and now Harry and Sally are aruging in the kitchen at Marie and Jess's wedding. And in the time it took to find a picture that I wanted, Sally is at the New Year's Eve party and Harry is catching up on his window shopping. If there was a job where you could make a living wasting time, I would be perfect for it.